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the grommom

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10 Rules for a Happy Marriage: A Dr. Dave and Monica VLOG

by Monica 23 Comments

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10 rules of happy marriage

Welcome to our first couple-video!  Dave and I were inspired by Valentine’s Day (ok, I was,) and we thought it would be fun to do a marriage-themed Vlog.  Dave was a great sport to play along…

We keep things pretty light in this one, mostly because I really wanted this to be a chance for you to get to know Dave a little, and to see the two of us together.  If you like it, let us know and maybe we’ll do more!

Have I mentioned that doing videos is a little nerve-wracking?

So I’ll go hide in a corner while you watch…

 

So…can I come out now?  What’d you think?

**In case you need the cliff-notes version:

Dr. Dave and Monica’s TOP TEN RULES FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE:
(Dave covered the odds, Monica had the evens…)

1.  Go along to get along.  Dave suggests it’s usually easiest to go along with your wife’s ideas/plans, but really the idea is just to get along.  Most wives think things through, plan well, and guys can trust us with the details.
2.  Communication.  Connect every single day.  Keep up on each other’s lives.
3.  Listen!  Women need to talk.  A lot.  Dave knows this well.
4.  Love Languages.  If you haven’t read Gary Chapman’s “the Five Love Languages” book, get it!  (click here for Amazon link–> The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts) Learn what speaks LOVE to your spouse…Your relationship will be better when you are communicating your love to each other in a way that has meaning to your spouse.
5.  Be thoughtful!  Tune in to each other’s lives…Call from work to check in when you can.  Let your spouse know that you’re thinking of him/her.
6.  Plan Time Together!  Get out and enjoy one another!  Find a hobby or activity and do it together throughout your years.  This builds memories and shared experiences.
7.  Date Nights!  Guys:  Plan them and get bonus points.  Be consistent and your marriage will grow!
8.  Connect with other couples.  Through small groups at a church or a group study.  Find quality couples that you trust.  Share your marriage with others and you’ll realize that the things you deal with are normal.
9.  Girls need girlfriends (and guys need dude-friends.)  There are simply things that we won’t understand about one another.  Good friends will understand us and this will also take the load off of our spouses.
10.  Have fun together!  Lighten-up.  Less stress, more fun.  Laugh at yourself…your kids….your dogs.  Enjoy each other for a happier marriage.

Obviously, we left out some of our deeper, core values, like praying together, and a lot of other things.  (finances, working out conflict, etc. etc…) Like I said, this was more for fun, and we (or at least I) will get into more at another time.  Feel free to ask questions, or share from your experiences in the comments, below!  I would LOVE to hear some of your own “rules” for a happy marriage!

Thank you for stopping in.  This was so much fun for me!!  And I think Dave did great, don’t you?
ALOHA!
Monica

Aloha, Monica
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Comments

  1. Donna Rovito says

    April 13, 2015 at 2:47 pm

    Monica, this is MARVELOUS and you look wonderful! I think this video was downright courageous of both of you and would love to see you do more. I plan to post this on the Physician Family Facebook page just as soon as I finish this comment! Great work!

    Reply
  2. Corinna says

    August 21, 2014 at 9:05 am

    Hey Monica, loved your vid, and I would NEVER have even noticed your hair thing if you hadn’t pointed it out.

    Keep it coming.

    ~Corinna

    Reply
  3. Holly Swain says

    August 12, 2014 at 6:45 am

    That was funny and so ridiculously true. Dave is a trooper… the kind of guy all girls need.

    Reply
  4. Lucy K says

    February 20, 2014 at 3:54 am

    You guys are so adorable together! Nice to meet you Dave!

    Thanks for the tips.

    Lucy

    Reply
    • grommom says

      February 20, 2014 at 7:27 am

      Dave says nice to meet you too, Lucy! 🙂 XO

      Reply
  5. Danielle Helena says

    February 19, 2014 at 7:45 pm

    Loved it! You guys remind me a lot of my husband and I, but we’ve only been married for 2 years–dated for 11 though, so I guess we do have some experience under our belts 😉 I loved all 1-10! I think if I had to add one I’d add trying something new together on a regular basis (alone or as a family). I find Jeff and I connect the most (and have the most fun too!) when we’re stepping outside our typical go-to activities. This can be something as simple as trying out a new restaurant or something as big as taking a trip to a new place you’ve never been to! Thank you for this video and I can’t WAIT for the next one!!

    Reply
  6. Katie says

    February 18, 2014 at 10:45 pm

    Loved the video and your tips! I shared it with the ladies at work! About how often do you guys try to do date nights? That’s something I want to start doing!

    Reply
  7. Teddi says

    February 18, 2014 at 7:48 pm

    Loved it!! Dave did great. Congrats!

    Reply
  8. Christie says

    February 18, 2014 at 6:05 pm

    Ya’ll are adorable 🙂

    Reply
  9. Heather || Heather's Dish says

    February 18, 2014 at 3:17 am

    Y’all are too stinking cute, and I am so glad we got to “know” Dave a little more! It’s so funny, Nate works in video production, but getting him to be the one in front of the camera? NO WAY! Haha Dave’s a brave man 🙂

    Reply
  10. Melissa K says

    February 18, 2014 at 1:35 am

    You guys are great. Love the video. So great to see you both together. Congrats to Dave on his debut.

    Reply
    • Nick says

      February 18, 2014 at 12:51 pm

      My wife mentioned she thought this was informative and humorous. I watched it and am claiming credit for 1, 2, 3, and 10. Also, I think Dave looks best from the eyebrows down, so kudos for framing him so.

      Reply
  11. Elaine says

    February 18, 2014 at 1:32 am

    This was great! Thanks so much for sharing. I love your Vlogs 🙂

    Reply
  12. Melissa Boyd says

    February 18, 2014 at 1:32 am

    Great video! We are in a season of life where my hubby needs support from me. He is away 4 nights a week as he is going for his masters then moving our family to go for his PhD. He needs from me the moral support only a wife can give. I need to remember this is just a season! Sometimes hard for me to remember!

    Reply
  13. Shannon says

    February 18, 2014 at 12:48 am

    Great advice! Thanks for sharing. We find the same things work for us as well.
    Keep things fun, communicate and find time to be together! Words to live by, I think.

    Reply
  14. Bidda says

    February 18, 2014 at 12:33 am

    Monica you are a good driver,do you remember these words from our past,lucky Dave,this was so good,it will hit home with so many,you guys are so great,I admire you for doing this video, keep it going,I want to learn more.

    Reply
    • grommom says

      February 18, 2014 at 1:11 am

      haha, Yes Bidda==those words are familiar! 🙂 You’re so sweet. You could teach us youngun’s as well. (haha)
      Aloha!!

      Reply
  15. Greg Lake says

    February 17, 2014 at 10:01 pm

    Great tips, but also just great to hear your voices again. 🙂

    Say hi to Dave for me!

    Greg

    Reply
  16. Wendy says

    February 17, 2014 at 7:07 pm

    Most. Adorable. Couple. EVER!!!! You guys are so sweet!!! Thanks for such a great video!!! Really enjoyed it. I don’t have anything to add, but, so much of it resonated with me about my marriage with Paul. We’ll be married 15 years this year and it’s amazing how the time flies. I really agree with everything you said about making time for each other, setting aside time for date nights, having fun together, etc. Growing up, my mother gave me the advice: “marry someone who makes you laugh, who has a good sense of humor. Because that will help you both get through the good and bad times together.” And I am SO glad I took her advice!! Paul cracks me up and I love spending time with him. And he’s so silly with our son, Tommy, it makes me happy to think that Tommy will make his future spouse laugh, too!! I also really agree with the importance of girl time, too. I belong to a playgroup that began before our babies could crawl, and now some of our kids are in school full day and we still meet weekly. It’s served so many purposes over the years, to compare child-rearing notes, support each others life ups and downs, etc. and as you said, it takes some of the pressure off the spouse. 🙂 Even for Moms who aren’t stay-at-home Moms, you can connect with the other Moms at soccer practice on the weekends or at the playground or whatever. I really loved your video, Monica and Dave–keep up the great work!! Thank you!!

    Reply
  17. Shanna S (@PinaCocoblog) says

    February 17, 2014 at 5:45 pm

    You two are so cute!! And almost 18 years married?? That is so awesome! Dave reminds me a lot of my husband, Bob. Laid back, funny and lets me do all the talking. As if guys have a choice.. ha ha. I was cracking up out loud at Dave saying women have 150k words a day to say and guys say 150 words. So true! ha ha ha. One thing that Bob and I have that helps our marriage is to always be each other’s best friend. That helps with so much when we talk about things, confide in each other, vent to each other etc. It lets us remember that we aren’t taking things out on each other or that anything is the other one’s fault ( well most of the time.. ha ha) but that we listen as a friend as well as spouse.

    Reply
  18. kindy miller says

    February 17, 2014 at 5:45 pm

    hi dave & monica! it’s kindy. thanks for the chit chat. I can’t even remember what anniversary josh & I have coming up. I think it’s 15? we need to improve on #1-10 🙂 and josh is the talker…for sure. love you guys! ~kindy

    Reply
  19. Urban Wife says

    February 17, 2014 at 4:24 pm

    That was great! Y’all are adorable. 🙂 I’m looking forward to some more marriage insight. We’re on year 6 of marriage so I certainly don’t feel qualified to give advice but the ten things on your list certainly resonate with me. (Although in this season we are in of life, #7 seems rather unattainable right now – lol!)

    Reply
  20. Sandy says

    February 17, 2014 at 7:52 am

    Did Dave use all his 150 in this video alone?

    Oh and Dave, apparently your 18th wedding anniversary is coming up. You better be planning a big #7 for it. Just know that it doesn’t really count as a “date night”, anniversaries are stand alone in that regard.

    Reply

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